Happy Halloween!

Not a major day of too much other than crappy weather. Again. But at least this time it is cooling down some. No more rain on the forecast (as of yet anyway), for the next week, but tons of sunny and cooler instead. I'll take that. Bug and I need to get out of the house more for fresh air and exercise. Kind of miserable when it is almost 90 outside and muggy. Remember that ol' nasty driveway of mine? Well, it is STILL nasty when it rains. Drew tries to smooth it out on a regular basis, but with the amount of rain we have been having, it makes it difficult, so right now it is muddy and severely rutted. I am about over it. One good storm renders it impossible for me to get out for a couple of days, and when I can, my poor little SUV ends up looking like a freak show mom car that just attempted to race the Bigfoot truck at a mud bog. Add in leaning into it to lock in a car seat in the middle, and I end up just as muddy. What an issue. One day maybe I will have a normal mud/dust free drive way. It will take some major dirt being brought in to build it up, and some widening so our tires stay out of the puddles. In a perfect world, there will be rock or gravel on top of that for a little traction. I'm not holding my breath though.

Speaking of SUV's, we are thinking of upgrading to a Ford Expedition. My truck is almost paid off, and it is very tiny with a car seat in the back, so when one of us are back soothing Chase, we have to sit pretty much on one butt cheek to fit. And leg room (for Drew at least) is non existent. My little stubs fit, but not very comfortably. We had been discussing waiting until my truck was paid off before getting another, but what the heck, right? There will be a payment anyway, and if we can stay within the budget we already have set, it will be ok. Yeah, Brandi... keep telling yourself that.

So, prompted by my husband, we got out of the house for a little bit this afternoon. We drove to the big metropolis of Crestburg and looked at vehicles. I freaking HATE how pushy car sales people are. I get that they are supposed to be that way, and it is how they make a living, but for crying out loud, quit breathing down my neck already!!! One of them tried to guilt me into coming inside to meet the manager by saying if we didn't he would get in trouble. Okiedokie. Sure you will. He was even more upset when I wouldn't give him our home number. Like I want pressure calls all next week when I am not even 100% sure that I am even going to go through with this. His response? 'I was a bail bondsman for years... believe me, I can get your number.' My rebuttal? 'I dare you. I keep an airhorn by the phone for telemarketers.' ::end convo:: ((hehehe))

While we were in town, after eating at McDonald's, of course (yes, I am still addicted to the fries. My kid entered the world thinking he was a fry) we went to the Fall Festival downtown and watched podunk's finest walk around. The kids walking around with their trick-or-treat bags were cute. Some of the adults, not so much. Some people just have no business dressing up as a playboy bunny, or a hooker, or pretty much anything that covers less than 3% of their body when their body is 100% bigger than the normal Susie Q. I am not bashing the overweight. Hell, I am overweight. I just think sometimes people need to look in the mirror before they leave the house, Halloween or not. Not everyone wants to see their girly bits in the daylight. I know I don't. But it did make for great entertainment, as much as I hate to admit it! A few times all I could say was WOW! I reckon I had better stop before I dig myself a hole I can't get out of. If I can't say something nice, don't say anything at all.

That was our day. Chase enjoyed getting out I think. Lots to look at. He was especially happy when Mommy took him out of the stroller and carried him. He was mesmerized by all of the going ons, and I really enjoyed watching him soak it all in. It never ceases to amaze me. Hopefully, it was enough to keep him asleep until tomorrow. The sleep issue is a can of worms I dare not open tonight. Better head to sleep... just in case. =)


Oh... don't forget to turn back your clock! Don't let the ghouls get ya!

I'm baaaack!

Yes, I know. It has been a while. Almost a year to be exact. Sue me. I have a valid excuse, so hear me out. One year ago today, 7 days after the visit with the Perinatologist and being diagnosed with PCOS, I found out I was pregnant. Because of all of my prior miscarriages, Drew and I wanted to keep it hush, hush until we knew the baby would stick. 2 weeks after I got my BFP (big fat positive), I was put on bed rest. The placenta was separating away from my uterus. I agree, this would have been the perfect opportunity to blog away, however, nothing was going on... except the pregnancy, so basically, nothing to write about (only because it was a secret, mind you). That is unless you wanted to hear about how nothing was on TV. Or how I went through several books a week. Or how I attempted to teach myself to knit (An EPIC fail, by the way).

We told the world last Christmas when my body made it to 13 weeks, and started letting our guard down allowing ourselves to believe this would really happen. At this point in time, I was still on bedrest and not very confident about the situation, but I was excited (and scared) none the less. Dr appointments at least once, sometimes twice a week, lots of ultrasounds and tests trying to make sure we were doing everything we could to keep the pregnancy going.

January comes, and by the end of it I am allowed light activity. The cows were starting to hatch at the farm Drew works at, so I spent LOTS of hours each day sitting in a chair watching for calves to be born. There ended up being a total of 76 by the beginning of April. One ended up at our house.

Meet Maizey. She was born a twin, but her mom just wasn't producing enough milk for two, so home she came. Are you seeing a pattern here yet? Cats, dogs, and now a cow...

This was great for me. It gave me something to do to occupy my time until the BIG DAY in July. I took her under my wing. She got a (big) bottle twice a day. She turned into a pet. I spent all day with her while it was cool, and then mornings and evenings for hours each day as it got warmer. She weighed less than 60 pounds the day she came home now she weighs closer to 460.
For 13 weeks I bottle fed her. I sat with her. I brushed her. I read books with her, as she laid next to me soaking up the sun. We took walks. She thought I was her Mom. If I could have brought her in the house, believe me I would have!

The pregnancy continued, with not a whole lot of excitement. A few trips to Labor and Delivery for an issue here and there, but all in all not bad. I felt the baby bug kick. We knew we were expecting a boy. We named him Chase Ronald.

On July 8th, 2009 at 10 after midnight I was admitted into the hospital for induction. At this point I was terrified, and to be honest, more worried about Maizey than meeting my son. I had dilly dallied with everything up to this point. Preparing for a baby. Sterilizing bottles. Washing baby clothes. Setting up the bassinet. Packing my hospital bag. Each step brought on a new emotional meltdown, and I just didn't think I could go through it (what choice did I have? Chase was coming out one way or the other)

They wheeled me to my birthing room and after dressing into a most flattering hospital johnny, answering the same questions for the millionth time, getting stuck with a needle 5 times to get the IV started, the induction began.

I kept waiting for something. Anything. I kept getting nothing. Drew fell asleep about an hour after they started everything they needed to do, so I was mad at him for not staying up with me. I tried watching TV. I did Sudoku. I fumbled with word finds. I attempted to read. I even brought my trusty laptop so I could stay in contact with the rest of the world. Looked like I was in it for the long haul by myself. Go figure!

12 hours into it, I still was not progressing. Pitocin was almost full blast and I still was not contracting. The Dr decided we should proceed with a c-section, non emergent, the baby was OK, but spoke with Drew and my sister and explained things could become dangerous quickly and he would rather not take that chance. I was a high risk pregnancy and the baby was healthy, he would rather keep it that way. Not to mention Chase was lying transverse (sideways) and showed no signs of moving down. So there I lay, expected to give my consent to the thing I had had horrific nightmares about for the last 10 years. They were going to cut me open and rip my guts out, and I was going to have to be awake for them to do it. Something tragic would happen, I would bleed out, have a stroke, die of an embolism (did I ever tell you about my overactive imagination?). My Dr gave me a few minutes to decide and I will admit I was more scared than I had ever been in my life, but I didn't feel like I had that much of a choice. So I said OK.

Things happened super fast from that point on. The anesthesiologist must have been waiting outside the door because he was in there in a blink. Spinal in (miserable experience, but I just won't go there) and within 5 minutes they wheeled me into the OR. Screen up. Test for feeling (none), next thing I know Drew is sitting next to me and I smell burning flesh. The cautery cutting me open (so it begins). I tried to stay calm, but panic was welling up inside me. I am pretty sure I was crying, not out of excitement, but out of pure unadulterated fear. I feel this huge pressure that was (what I can only guess, anyway) the equivalent of the Dr pulling all of my insides out at once. I guess this was partially true. At 12:41pm, I hear a high pitched scream and all of a sudden there is a skinny bloody blob hanging over the screen dripping down on me. I cried some more... this time out of excitement and then they took him out of my line of sight.

HUGE MISTAKE!

I no longer had anything to focus on, except for what they were doing to me. Panic welled inside of me like nothing I had ever felt before and it all went downhill from there. I won't go into details. It was bad. I am sure my Dr is still telling the story to this day. As a matter of fact, I allowed my panic to control me so much, I am pretty sure when I get pregnant again I will have to find a new Dr to deliver me.

But I did it! I'm a Mommy!

We brought Chase home 2 days later, and 5 days after that I fell in love with him. Uncontrollably. Eternally. Completely.in.love. The stats... 6lbs 15 oz, 20 inches long. Apgars were 8/10. Totally healthy.

Fast forward to now. It's almost 4 months later. My Bug man is growing up so fast. We have finally fell into a routine that allows me a lot of fun with my little guy. I (usually) get more than 3 hours sleep a night now... as a matter of fact, with the exception of a few days last week, he has been sleeping through the night for a month now. He has a huge personality, and is hitting his milestones on time. Lots going on. In my new found Mommy hood, I have been reminded of my huge love of being in the kitchen. No, he's not eating food yet... but Mommy and Daddy are. I have been cooking up a storm, trying new recipes and getting my husband fat(as if). Drew is loving it, and comes home from work to play with the baby just to give me time to play in the kitchen. It is my new 'me' time.

We (finally) started the nursery a couple of weeks ago. Pretty bare right now... lots of decorating to do. He started sleeping in there almost 2 weeks ago. He did great... Mommy had withdrawals!

So, as you can see... lots going on. There will be lots to blog about. Lots to brag about. Lots to share. I am going to try to keep it going this time. Hang in there. I will post updates of the property (it has changed a lot) as soon as I can. Lots to catch up on too!

Welcome Back! =)